I Won't Say I'm in Love
by DancingRaindrops
Summary: Sonny is in denial. Major denial. Will anyone get her to finally admit her feelings for Chad?


A/N: Hello! I've been writing a lot of one-shots lately, they're filling my time while I try to think of a plot for a full-on story. So I hope you like this one, please review! Oh, and I own nothing.

**I Won't Say I'm in Love**

I don't like Chad. Of course I don't! So why does everyone keep saying that I do? He's a conceited jerk. Not that I'm really known for liking awesome guys. I mean, look at James Conroy!

_If there's a prize for rotten judgment_

_I guess I've already won that_

That was a mess. I was completely sucked in by his flirtatious lines and his beautiful flowers. And then he dumped me – for Tawni! That stung. It really did. And I promised myself from then on that I would never fall for another jerk. And I haven't! I never will. Besides, the whole incident with James doesn't matter anymore. I'm over it. And I'm _so_ over Chad Dylan Cooper. I never even needed to be over him! Because there was _never_ anything there. And why would there be? There's no point to it – the eventual heartbreak. Yes, I'm an optimist, but when it comes to falling for jerks, the end result is always the same. I should know, I've experienced it. And I definitely don't need to again.

_No man is worth the aggravation  
That's ancient history –  
Been there, done that!_

Which I told Tawni. But of course she didn't listen!

**Flashback**

"**Tawni, I'm gonna be right back, I've just gotta get something real quick," I said, standing up to leave our dressing room.**

"**Just gotta get something? Or just gotta meet someone? Or **_**hope**_** to meet someone?" she asked coyly, flipping her hair as she let out a small giggle.**

"**What? What are you talking about?" was my bewildered response.**

"**Oh, **_**sure**_**. Pretend you don't know what – or rather, **_**who **_**– I'm talking about. Everyone knows already, Sonny, it's no secret."**

"**What? I'm confused. Are you still mad about that whole Hayden thing?"**

"**Ugh, I am **_**so**_** over Hayden. That is the last time I date someone poorer than me. No, I was talking about your precious **_**Chad Dylan Cooper**_**."**

"**Wha – what? Pshhht, I don't like Chad!" I squeaked out in a high voice. "I mean, I don't like Chad," I repeated in a deeper tone. This feels like déjà vu. "Besides, Chad's a jerk. I would never like a jerk. Well, never _again_. I learned **_**that**_** much at least from James Conroy."**

"**Whatever, Sonny. Just go and 'get your something' as you said you had to, and then come back and tell me all**** about your _fascinating_ little meeting with Chad that will inevitably happen. Cuz you know it will."**

"**No, it won't. I know it won't."**

_**Twenty minutes later**_

"**So he said 'Good!' and I said 'Good!' and then I left! That sure showed him!" I finished recounting to Tawni.**

"**Uh huh. Anyways. I was right! I told you, didn't I? You **_**did**_** meet Chad!" I opened my mouth to deny this, but I soon found that no words came out – mainly because I **_**couldn't**_** deny it. "See, Sonny? You don't have to say anything. But we all know that you like Chad! It's pretty funny," she added before flouncing out of the dressing room, leaving me dumbfounded behind her.**

**End Flashback**

_Who d'you think you're kiddin'  
He's the Earth and heaven to you  
Try to keep it hidden  
Honey, we can see right through you  
Girl, ya can't conceal it  
We know how ya feel and  
Who you're thinking of_

But Tawni was wrong. I don't like Chad. It's just coincidence that I always happen to run into him. And just because I always think about our conversations throughout the day and how I should have said something or other, that doesn't mean I like him. Just because our "Good!" and "Fine!" arguments are the highlight of my day, that doesn't mean I like him. Just because it makes me happy when he "comes to my rescue" when I need it (or he thinks I need it), that doesn't mean I like him. Because I _don't_.

_No chance, no way  
I won't say it, no, no_

Selena even thought I liked him. And she doesn't even know me! She waltzed in here with her - her - "wizardy relationship dust" and started thinking that I liked him!

**Flashback**

"**I can't believe you kissed Chad! Where in the script does it say that 'Sonny kisses Chad'?!" I don't really know why I was so angry…I just felt this burning sensation when I saw Selena kissing Chad – I knew it had to stop. Oh, I know why. I bet it was because I was worried that people would think that **_**I **_**actually kissed Chad. Yeah, that's why.**

"**It's not in the script. I told you, I want to play your character honestly and realistically." Pshht! Honestly? Realistically? Puh-lease.**

"**Okay, and you honestly think I would kiss Chad?" I laughed to emphasize my point.**

"**Yes, I do," she replied, imitating my laugh.**

"**Uh, well, I would never kiss him," I stated emphatically.**

"**In that scene," she added.**

"**No! Not anywhere! Not in that scene, not in a dream, not in a car, not near, not far, not here, not there, not anywhere – I'm rhyming, aren't I? See, I do that when I don't want to kiss somebody!" Of course I don't want to kiss him! Why would I? I don't like him, so why would I want to kiss him? **

"**Really, Sonny? Really?" Selena asked, sounding just like Chad. She drew it out, making sure I could hear the skepticism in her voice. Well, what does she know anyways? Nothing! Stupid relationship wizard. She knows nothing.**

**End Flashback**

_You swoon, you sigh  
Why deny it, uh-oh_

I can't like Chad. That's so – so – ridiculous! I can see the headline now – "Good Girl From Wisconsin Falls for Hollywood's Bad Boy." No, that's only the stuff of movies. Never going to happen. Me and Chad, no relationship, not now, not ever.

_It's too cliché  
I won't say I'm in love_

I already went through this with James! Feeling…something for someone who's a jerk is not good. Even though just the thought of him makes you smile, and even though you feel like you're beautiful and special when he grins at you, and even though – well, it's not good! Which I keep telling myself. I can't feel that way!

_I thought my heart had learned its lesson  
It feels so good when you start out  
My head is screaming "Get a grip, girl!  
Unless you're dying to cry your heart out, oh"_

**Flashback**

"**Sonny, I know you like Chad, but would you just be quiet about his gifts already? Yes, we get it – he was nice for once. He was generous. He put thought into all our gifts. Uh huh. But we don't need to hear it twenty times!" burst out a frustrated Nico. Apparently I had been going on for awhile about – well, Chad.**

"**I don't like Chad!" came out in a high-pitched voice. Ugh, I really need to work on that.**

"**Yeah, yeah, save it. We all know you're lying. It's pretty obvious. Anyone who sees you look at him can tell. Just deal with it already, would you? Denying it is getting on all of our nerves. It doesn't do anything. Just tell him!" **

**I had no response to that.**

**End Flashback**

_You keep on denying  
Who you are and how you're feeling  
Baby, we're not buying  
Hon, we saw ya hit the ceiling  
Face it like a grown up  
When ya gonna own up  
That ya got, got, got it bad_

No! I don't like Chad. And no matter what anyone does, I'm never going to say that I do.

_No chance, no way  
I won't say it, no, no_

**Flashback**

**Tawni walked into our dressing room to find me placing my autographed picture of Chad (which he had signed especially for me, with a lovely message) with the rest of my stuff in the room.**

"**Girl, you have got it bad," was all she said.**

"**Huh?" I snapped out of my…dare I say, dream-like state.**

"**I'll try to put it the way you'll understand. Check it out! Sonny's boy-grinning! Check it out! She's thinking about Chad! Check it out! She likes him!" she elaborated, referring to our sketch.**

"…**I – Don't – Like – Chad," I said carefully, pausing in between the words to make sure I was keeping my voice normal.**

"**Check it out! Sonny's lying!"**

"**Check it out! I'm leaving!"**

"**Check it out! Say hi to Chad for me when you see him!"**

**The nerve of her, I oughtta…**

"**Sonny."**

"**Chad. Tawni says hi."**

**End Flashback**

_Give up, give in  
Check the grin, you're in love_

Ridiculous. Tawni's the worst of them all. She goes overboard on the whole "I like Chad" thing. She teased me to no end when we were filming that stupid movie of Chad's. That scene where I'm "confessing my love for him"? That was a stupid scene. And it was certainly not worth the trouble it caused. It's pointless, too, because it will never come true. It was make-believe. It won't happen in real life. Tawni should know that.

_This scene won't play  
I won't say I'm in love_

**Flashback**

"**Sonny! Aren't you happy Jackson Tyler isn't coming after all??" asked Grady excitedly.**

"**Um, no, actually, I'm not." Happy to be stuck with Chad instead? Why would I be?**

"**Aw, why not? He's a stupid actor, with his red eyes and creepy…"**

"**Grady, can I talk to you later? I've kinda gotta go get Chad his 'sammich.'"**

"**You're actually getting that? Sonny, you're crazy. You don't have to do stuff for him. Girls never do stuff for a guy unless they like him." He paused, absorbing what he had just said. "Whoa. Whoa. Whoa! **_**You**_** like **_**Chad Dylan Pooper**_**!"**

**I sighed. "No, Grady. I. Don't."**

**He scoffed in return. "Oh yeah? Then why are you getting that sandwich for him?" I didn't know what to say to that. "Yeah, that's what I thought. Listen, when a girl actually does what a guy does for him, that means she likes him. Big time."**

**I stood there with my mouth open as Grady walked away, shaking his head and muttering "Chad Dylan Pooper? Geez." After reliving the conversation, I decided it wasn't worth my contemplation at the moment, and went to get Chad's sandwich.**

**End Flashback**

_You're doin' flips  
Read our lips  
You're in love_

They're all wrong. All of them! I don't like Chad, and I never will! If they're waiting for me to admit it, then they'll be waiting a long, long time.

_You're way off base  
I won't say it  
Get off my case  
I won't say it_

**Flashback**

"**I don't know what you see in that guy," remarked Selena after a day of working with Chad.**

"**What? Are you kidding me? I don't see anything in that guy. And I wish you would stop insisting that I do."**

_**Later that day**_

"**Let me see…you're happy! Let me guess. Chad." Tawni said. It wasn't even a question.**

"**Yes! He gave me the part! You know, he's really nice on the inside." _'And on the outside. I mean, have you looked at him?' _I wanted to add. But of course I didn't. Can you imagine what would happen if I did?**

"**Uh huh. Shocker! No way." Her voice dripped with heavy sarcasm. **

"**But I still don't like Chad."**

"**Sonny, it's fine if you do. Which you do. So it's fine. Just accept it. The rest of us already have."**

"…"

**End Flashback**

_Girl, don't be proud  
It's ok, you're in love_

I don't like Chad. I think that should be my new saying. Because I don't like him. And for all those people waiting for me to say that I like him, they'll just have to keep waiting. Because I won't say it. Not to anyone. Except maybe myself. Because, honestly? Who could resist?

_Oh...  
At least out loud  
I won't say I'm in love_

A/N: Reviews are appreciated. :)


End file.
